Hogwarts: A Book of Questions
by Lancette M. Kirkpatrick
Summary: **Book 2 up** All your questions answered in this book. Things that have you puzzled or bugging you forever are now in this book!
1. General

Warning: this is for the perverted, ill, crazy, and humorous people in this world.  If you can't handle parodies or even have a sense of humor you should not read on.  These are all my views and nothing else.

Hogwarts: The Book of Questions 

Certain questions have remained unanswered in the Hogwarts books.  Like how many bathrooms are there?  OR Where does Draco get all that hair gel?  Most questions will be answered in this book.  Even your deep questions

Book I

Q: When under the invisibility cloak and holding a lantern underneath it, does any light show?

A: Yes, light does show.  The lantern would be invisible but there would be an orb of light coming out of the cloak.  Which makes it a little odd at night.

Q: Do the House Elves know how to make a Pizza?

A: Probably.  There is at least one or two in the Hogwarts kitchen that know how to make it.  Like all House Elves you could just tell them how to make it and it will come out to your liking.

Q: Where does Draco get all that hair gel to slick back his hair?

A:  His mother sends him a bottle in the mail every week.  She knows how looks are everything in their family.

Q:  How long does it take him to do his hair in the morning?

A: Well, I don't spy on Draco (yet).  But if he's like every other muggle guy it probably takes him about 10 – 20 minutes depending on the day.  We all know how hair can be on a bad day.

Q:  Is there any Racism in the school?

A: There most likely is.  Everywhere has racial slurs, jokes, and hate.  Not all that hate is focused just because you are not a pure blood.  From the diversity in Hogwarts I bet there is some racial battles or wars but are not mentioned or even acknowledged.  

Q: Are world politics and world wars discussed?

A: Yes, in muggle studies.  It's not deeply discussed because the wizarding world politics are more important to the kids.  I'm sure a little world history is introduced in either the 6th or 7th years at Hogwarts.  

Q: How many bathrooms are there?

A:  Enough to accommodate the school or course.  There is probably one on every floor or even two.  The ones with bathtubs are near every house common room.  Teachers have their own bathrooms.  Then there are the Prefects bathrooms.  There are bathrooms that might be hidden too.  None we've never seen or heard of.

Q: Do the Teachers ever get out of the school during the school year?

A: McGonagall, Hagrid, DADA teachers, and others do go to Hogsmead in the past books.  Dumbledore does go out for meetings and other stuff.  Other than that they are pretty much bound to Hogwarts unless something important comes up and they must leave the grounds.

**That is it for Questions I can think of.  If you have any questions that have been boggling your mind about Hogwarts or the wizarding world email me them at warmwinterblood@yahoo.com  

Remember these answers would be how I would see it.  I will soon start setting up themes to each book depending on how many questions I get.**


	2. Sexual

These are my views on Hogwarts life.  If you don't like them… PISS OFF!  The first 2 questions are from an unknown reader.  If you would like to submit questions please email me at warmwinterblood@yahoo.com.  Don't put it in the review… I don't want to get suspended again.  Cuz that means you don't get updates.  The readers of my other stories will be after you if you do that to me.  Enjoy!

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Book II

Q: Is there sexual Harassment in school?

A: Defiantly.  Everywhere has sexual harassment.  Harassment comes in all kinds in Hogwarts.  Some you do see written in the books.  Most of it is mental and physical harassment.  The Sexual kind is hidden beyond the halls.  Most of it is inside houses.  Girls are the victim, usually.  Hormone raging guys need to take it out, and when they don't get attention some resort to the harassment kind.  It is hard getting sex from a girl that doesn't like you.  Most cases go unreported due to embarrassment and teachers not believing them.  Consequence to this is just a few night detentions.

Q:  Are there sexual relationships?

A: Yes.  Girls and Guys Hormones are raging around the 3rd year till they graduate.  If they don't get it out sexual tension rises and the students become unbearable to the teachers.  They are taken out in some form either in masturbation or sex.  Couples after awhile trust each other and have sex.  They try not to do it in dorm rooms due to sharing with 3 other people.  Empty classrooms scatter Hogwarts and that's where some couples can be found.  

Q: Is there witch's pornography?

A:  I have not seen any because I am too young to go in some of the shops in Diagon Ally and Hogsmeade.  But most likely there are some shops that carry them.  Single men need to get their sexual tension out some how.

Q: Are their any forms to calm hormones?

A: Yes.  There are a few potions and charms out there.  They only last for whiles but work in the long run.

Q: What kind of Contraceptives do they offer in the Wizarding World? 

A: Most shops carry them, but do not allow young witches and wizards to wonder near them.  There is a small book called _Unwanted Young Mothers.  _That book consists of charms and potions.  Not many kids and teenagers are able to get a hold of this book.  Only adults can get this book.  Stories will rarely sell this book.  It just goes down to the Morals of the wizarding world.

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I can't come up with anything more.  If you have any questions, please email me.  The next book will come out when I can come up with more questions.


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